someone once said (dont remember who and neither do i remember their exact words which dont matter anyway): nostalgia is when we look back at the past and fool ourselves that life was better then. i actually used to have the actual quotation pinned up somewhere but that was a long time ago. now i struggle to remember whether the author was correct, whether life was indeed better back then. well i do remember that i never had to worrry about a lot of stuff....no thats a lie. i did worry about the last time i wore an outfit, if someone would think it was the only one i had. i used to worry if that boy i had a crush had seen that i was wearing a new sweater, or if he sat on my good side in class. now that i think of it i remember something that i used to do. i liked to survey the classrooms and see which room he was studying in. i would then strategically sit opposite him. i would never talk to him or look in his direction (oh no heaven-forbid) but i would always make sure that my every action was deliberate and that he noticed it, how i held my pen and what book i was reading. at the end of it all the two hours prep period was a strain to my nerves and i was glad to then just slip away (after making sure that he watched me exit) and go to my dormitory to dream of him! oh how painful it was being young and infatuated.

but maybe life was better then because all of it was young, fresh and innocent. now you meet a guy and the moment he starts talking to you his eyes are dropping to below your neck. every word he says to you insinuates that he might like to sleep with you. you are saying one thing and all he can see is how your mouth curves when you laugh. i mean sheesh what happened to women being actual human being who have a brain that actually works on top of that cleveage. what happened to wanting to know what my favourite book is and whether i think that Obama or hillary will make it. when did women turn solely into an object of male fantasy i mean honestly!!!!