Tuesday, March 10, 2009

If i had met me now i wouldnt recognise myself

its been almost a year since i even visited this blog in fact i had all but forgotten all about it. but something pushed me to llok for it. it is this illness that has gotten hold of me that has sent me looking and searching for my roots, for myself in fact. i sat wondering who i was, who i had become and where i was going and i was shocked by what i learnt. i have no clue whatsover who i am, i am not evne sure what name i answer to at the moment. its all a bit blurry and i think it has been like this for the last two years i was jut too wrapped up in it to realise it. dont get me wrong i love being a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister but i guess i just forgot how to be me. and the revelation broke me down to tears. i used to be passionate about life, set in my beliefs, poetic, romantic, idealist, sentimental, i sued to be! now there are just not enough hours in the day and when by some miracle they are there, i just dont have the energy or the drive to pursue anything else. how did i end up in this rut? i mean honestly to qoute carrie Bradshaw in SATC-the movie " If i had met me now i wouldnt recognise mysel"